Let's get one thing straight: there's only ever one person who is responsible for rape or a sexual assault.
The perpetrator. Never the victim.
It's as simple as that.
It takes only one person to commit a sexual offence, and this policy remains the same no matter what the gender or the sexual orientation of the people involved.
It is astounding that in 2016 there is still such a culture of victim blaming when it comes to sexual crimes, particularly in relation to female victims.
Why is it that the clothes a women or a girl is wearing are even questioned when she is raped or sexually assaulted?
What if you were beaten over the head walking home while wearing a red jacket and you were told, "Oh, I'm sorry, but if you wear a red jacket you really should expect to get beaten over the head."
How would that make you feel? Would you feel betrayed? Upset? Confused?
Of course you would, and that is how victims of sexual assault feel when they are told wearing short skirts, high heels, low-cut tops, red lipstick etc meant they were "asking for it".
The same goes for a woman's mental state.
Protesters march in the Melbourne "Slut Walk" in 2014. Source: AAP
Why is it that women are forced to police the behaviour of men by remaining as sober and alert as possible at all times?
It seems whenever a sexual assault victim is found to have been drinking or on drugs the offender is somehow absolved of some of their guilt.
This is just so wrong.
Where is the outrage that accompanied the devastating but relatively few one-punch attacks that led to sweeping lock-out laws in Sydney?
Where is the mandatory sentencing for sexual assaults and rapes?
At no point is any sexual assault victim - female or male, young or old - asking for it.
A study released on Thursday by child rights organisation Plan International Australia and Our Watch found one third of women don't feel safe in public places after dark and nearly a quarter of those surveyed thought women shouldn't travel alone on public transport.
We live in a relatively safe country.
Women should feel safe to go where they please, when they please without fear of being attacked or raped.
Just as disturbing are the study's revelations of just how pervasive the culture of victim blaming has become.
It found 17 per cent of the people surveyed thought if a woman or girl wore revealing clothing she was partially responsible for any harassment or assaults on her.
This study was surveying women aged between 15 and 19.
If that is what the girls think, it is easy to imagine the boys are thinking along the same lines - a highly dangerous situation on both sides that can so easily lead to scandals like that revealed at the University of Sydney's Wesley College this week.
A college publication was used to maliciously slut-shame and objectify women; to hector and embarrass them for being sexual beings at the same time as making gods of the men who slept with as many of their female fellow students as possible.
Australia desperately needs a culture change to prevent further instances like this.
Rape and sexual assault is never funny. It is not a matter of "not being able to take a joke."
It is a crime, and a highly distressing one at that for the victims and their families.
Boys and girls need to be educated from a young age about respect: for each other, for themselves and for the wider society.
And the blame needs to be shifted from the victim to the offender, just as it is in every other crime.
